Saturday, September 5, 2009

Faultless for Misunderstanding

In a email exchange, a friend once send to me the following comment.
"I did not misunderstand. I mis-read."
WHAT EVERRRRRRRR. I thought to myself and forgot about it. I called him later to be sure I had not offended him and we both took at turn at an explanation of our opinions. Still, at the end he made this statement.
"You just mis-heard me"
Clearly what we had was a failure to communicate.

Recently I came to realize the humor that can come from
"Mis-heard" .

Thanks to the blessing of cell phones, we women can communicate in the car, in a store, waiting in line, or on the run. We are now in constant communication. We can now be "alone but never alone". And best friends, while sometimes they have a misunderstanding, remain connected even if miles apart. Yesterday was just such a day for both sides of that coin.

My best friend, who lives 200 miles away, was on her way to the drugstore and hit speed dial
as soon as she hit the gas pedal. Thus she did not have to run her errand alone. She had a travel companion thanks to technology. She soon arrived at the drugstore, put the car in park...."hold on a minute"....gathering her things....... "OK, I'm at the drugstore", she said.

I could hear the click click click of her heels echo in the store. My friend and I both suffer for the belief that we must be well dressed for every occasion, even a run to the drugstore. All activity requires the right and suitably cute shoe and complimentary purse, full makeup, hair done and nails painted.

With the click click click of her heels and the squeak of the wheels on her cart, she made her way
through the store. Making a stop at the makeup counter, we had a detailed discussion about mineral makeup verse the tried and true Maxfactor. The subject of new fall colors available in nail polish, OPI, also made it to the top ten things to discuss in a drugstore.

Soon the squeak and the click click click resumed and she was off to another section. Arriving at the actual original intended purpose for the store - the drug counter- she started to speak to the Pharmacist. "Oh, just a minute, I have to drop of this prescription for Roger" she said. I knew that already, as I could clearly hear her conversation with the Pharmacist and his assurance that he would have it ready in about twenty minutes.

Now I understand why so many other things are sold at the "DRUGSTORE". I think it must have been part of some greater plan to begin with. His real message sounded more like, "I'm going to take at least twenty minutes so you have plenty of time to go buy something else. Off with you woman, go buy something."

In a flash my friend was off down the aisles in search of treasures that just had to be taken home. Why waste the trip for just one thing and all. There is a halt of the click click click and the squeak and a break in the conversation. "Oh, I almost forgot I need some Viagra", she said.
Now I was not surprised to hear that, as her husband is twenty five years her senior and I
made no comment in reply.

"Hum", "I wonder", "I've never used that brand", and " I wonder how stiff is will be", she was saying more to herself that to me. As I had no idea that the level of stiffness was an option with the use of the little blue pill. My mind pondered for a moment, is that like firm verse baseball bat unbendible rigid????????? I ask the obvious question. "Dianna, what are you talking about"? With Di the answer can be anything for the normal to the extraordinary to the insanely funny, so I waited with great anticipation for the answer.

Her answer. "Well.........I'd like something pretty stiff", she said. That made sense but still I asked again, "What are you talking about, Di"?

Her answer. "Well......... faultless is good and I like magic sizing but I think I'll just get what we always use and get Viagra". She had to repeat it twice.

In my defense, before I go any farther in this story, I want you to know that she had a loose veneer on her front tooth and I'm using that an an excuse for the confusion.

"I didn't know it regulated size as well as firmness", I replied and she was quick with, "What are YOU talking about, Di. "You said you were at the drugstore and wanted some Viagra".
Her reply: "No silly, I said Niagara. I need some spray starch".

With that we both laughed until we began to cry. She, of course, had no tissue in her purse so she made a quick trip, click click, click and squeak, to the paper products aisle for some Kleenex.
Laughing all the way, I joined her via cell phone back to the makeup aisle for a quick face check and some mascara and off she went back to the pharmacist who was just calling out her name.

In conclusion, let me say that the best thing about having a best friend is the probability that you can have fun and find things to laugh about whether by letter, card, email, over lunch or by cellphone.

Clearly, I "mis-heard". Niagara NOT Viagra. At least not in that aisle.
You go girl............click click click squeak.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Cupcake Challenge

While working on a recent "art challenge" posted on a website for aspiring artists, I contemplated the use of the word cupcake. The challenge was to paint, in any medium, the row of cupcakes in a photograph. Each one was slightly different and would in real life application be the test of willpower for all children and anyone on a diet.

Mouth watering, eye teasing morsels of sweetness calling out....come on take a bite.

And so I pondered the the word it's self. Cupcake. I looked it up in the dictionary and all it said was, "small cake". Hum. Now I just recently used the word to refer to my car. "She a real cupcake", I said. My grandfather used it as a term of endearment. "You little cupcake", he'd say.

So........if a "cupcake" is just a small cake, I decided to look up CAKE and there I found a surprise or two.

cake (kak) n. 1. a small, flat mass of baked or fried dough, batter or hashed food.
NOT A PLEASING DESCRIPTION

2. a baked mixture of flour, eggs, sugar etc, often covered in icing.
AT LEAST I GOT A PLEASANT VISUAL ON THAT AS I CONTEMPLATED YUMMY ICING

3. a shaped solid mass, as of soap
OH NO NOT THE IMAGE I WAS LOOKING FOR

4. a hard crust or deposit
CRUSTY OLD DEVIL CAME TO MIND AND THAT IS CERTAINLY NOt MY IDEA OF SOMETHING TO RELISH.

5. (SLANG) to win a prize
FINALLY, A TERM TO GET ONES TEETH INTO. A SHOW OF VALUE THAT EQUATES THE LOVE FOR A CAR OR A CHILD.

So while not defined as such by Webster, I count CUPCAKE as a delightful morsel, just the right size. A deliciously decorated and pleasing compliment. A perfectly proportions object of desire or delight appropriate for holding with loving hands. An affection confection. Life it's self with sprinkles on top.

Sounds so much better than........SMALL CAKE.
If life is a piece of CAKE....let's grab it with both hands.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

National Public Television

On the creative side of morning muse, I reviewed my profile of me as "all things creative" and considered how that came about. I was quick to realize how much influence the TV has on people. Praise be to God is a literal statement, when I think of how National Public Television played a large part in the development of my skills sets. How grateful I am for the life long gifts I received from those hours spent in front of that programming.

As a child with two parents who both worked to create the comforts of life, I spent a great deal of time, particularly on Saturday, in front of NPT. The first lesson of life I may have learned is that if both parents work, Saturday is the only day of the week for taking care of the many things required to run a home. Laundry, Shopping, Lawn Care, Errands, all done on Saturday.

The "only child" soon learns that with a TV in the house, only does not equate alone.
NPT filled the time with information and influence that has lasted well beyond those formative years of viewing. So when someone asked, "how did you learn to do so many things, you are so creative?", it did not occur to me that it was NPT. But it was.

I still remember the first show/lesson on art. It was a lesson on drawing shapes; cones, balls, blocks of every kind. The values and placement of dark graduating to light. The cast shadow.
The smudging to blend. Soon followed the bigger picture of life on a canvas or a piece of paper, it was another life skill learned, colors manipulated with a brush. Each work a snap shot of experience, emotion, and nouns - people, places, things. Life long value in programming. Art.

The "guarentee" of Justin Wilson, the Cajun cook and "another glass of wine". The "bon appetite" of Julia Child with the freedom to making a mistake while making a meal. From her, I learned that as long as there are few ingredients about and a few pots and pans, food is more than food. It's an experience and an opportunity for hospitality but also sometimes an escape, a stolen moment or two for one's self. And so grew the love of all things culinary and the appreciation of all kitchen gadgets of every kind and type. Each new COOKING SHOW brought another recipe of culinary experience and expectation.


Master Piece Theater was just that.

I owe to all the "how to build it" shows, my general and literal experience in building and home repairs. This Old House continues on in it's various reinventions. I can truly say that the combination of watching my Dad and watching NPT gave real life skills that saved and save money, time and frustration. You can do any job with the right tool, the right attitude and a little knowledge, or so I took the programmed lessons of the various "HOW TO" shows. This Southern Girl even loves the Yankee Workshop.

I miss the original "VICTORY GARDEN". For those of us with less than a natural green thumb, it was our guide to all that nature gives. A feast for the eyes and soul in beautiful gardens or a simple singular flower. The sumptuous bounty of harvest from the planting to the plate. The relation of what grows for us, in lessons that would continue to spring in up in all seasons for many reasons.

SEW IT SEAMS that NPT is responsible for my craft and needlework skills. If it takes a needle and thread, I can do it. From smocking, quilting, knitting, needlepoint, children's sewing, craft sewing, adult tailoring, counted cross stitch, french sewing, to embroidery, NPT provided and provides the inspiration and guide sheet.

Still to this day, on Saturday. I turn on NPT and leave it on whether I am in the room or not.
Instruction, Inspiration, vocation, avocation all in one place for the benefit of all. NPT.



On the meditative side of muse.
Few people know that only five companies own 95% of all the entertainment, information and influence that shape our lives. Marshal McLuha, the sage and prophet of the electronic age, coined the phrase, "the medium is the message". And the rest is history. We are, as a society, controlled by what we see and hear through the media. Just as surely as a director, somewhere out there, programs the content, our actions are directly influenced and thus we are programed.

Our last election tells the story that every politician knows. The candidate that controls the media wins the election. We are programed to follow whatever is bombarded into our conscious and subconscious mind. How often we hear, "have to get the message out there".

By 2005 over 11 BILLION dollars were spent on food advertising and people wonder why we are, as a nation, obese. The subsequent crisis in health care tells the power of advertising.
We saw. We ate.

As behavior is based on emotion and emotion is greatly influenced by what we experience, see and hear, it become more and more clear that the media is the maze and we are the mice.

My suggestion.........NPT and more NPT

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

delayed start

I feel like the race horse that heard the bell but somehow just could not break out of the gate.
Great plans I had for that perfect start on the 1st day of September. My personal welcome to fall and the next season. Fall, a welcomed respite from the bright sun and searing temps. A gentle lull before the crisp and brisk that is coming. Door open, sound of chirps in the grass and trees, cool air and comfort of dusk, it's a perfect beginning for my seasons of muse.

So even with a slightly delayed start, I'm out of the gate and making that first stride. My friends seems to think I have "a way with words". We'll see. We thank the Google Gods for the blessing of creative outlet, swaddled in the protection of relative anonymity.

Now that I've taken the plunge into the pool, even if it is the shallow end, well maybe more like the baby pool, I'll take myself back to the HOW TO page and work on the strokes. With the full knowledge that like the NIKE ad...Just Do It... I did.